Monday, November 3, 2008
I have chosen to be in a foul mood for days now; actually for a week now. I have said that to myself during this time: "I am choosing to be a prune right now" and taken quiet satisfaction in my gloom. Like Eyeore, I reveled in my rain clouds. The results have been shocking; do you know how much your mood affects what actually happens to you? I had no idea until I took stock of my last week. I was jolted out of my blue reverie by an overwhelming show of gratitude- I received three thank you notes and gifts today- unbelievable! So I thought I had to choose to let go of my pruny mood.
My blues resulted in speaking out of turn in a board meeting and the repercussions of doing so (not severe, but for my normally serene mood all present were speechless and shocked). Next, a communication break-down between myself and a colleague created tension which previously did not exist (still working to fix it). Finally, exhaustion, stress and that terrible, selfish feeling of "I'm doing everything, and not getting a darn thing in return- so I quit!". Now that I reflect, I know that if I had taken these instances with an attitude of detachment and observation- none of them would have fed a gloomy disposition and feelings of unfairness. It's all in perspective. Too often, when results do not meet our objectives we look at changing the actions we took to get there, rather than the perspective we began with.
So thank you Universe, and that means you blog reader- for caring for me even while I stepped under a grey sky and shot lighting bolts from my eyes. Thank you for shocking me out of it, with an overwhelming show of support and generosity. I serve to give it back to you.